Category Archives: Reviews

“A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas” lights up the holidays with a Christmas (bong) hit

Stoners. They usually show up late or completely forget about major commitments. But thanks to a couple of contemporary cinema’s favorite potheads, the holiday season gets started even earlier than usual (I mean, we’re only a few days removed from Halloween) with A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas.

Everyting goes up in smoke for Harold (John Cho) and Kumar (Kal Penn) when the sacred tree catches fire.

That’s right, they’ve gone to White Castle, escaped from Guantanamo Bay and now they’re lighting up America’s most important holiday (in 3-D, no less). After being estranged for a couple of years, old pals Harold (now working in a Manhattan skyscraper and living with his wife in a suburban McMansion) and Kumar (still a down-and-out stoner who just found out his ex-girlfriend is pregnant) are reunited when a mysterious package addressed to Harold arrives at Kumar’s apartment. With each of them already dealing with holiday crises of their own, it initially seems as if the contents of the package will only drive the wedge that much harder between Harold and Kumar. But like their previous adventures, this weed-induced caper eventually brings the two back together again.

When things literally go up in smoke after Kumar’s delivery inadvertently catches Harold’s prize Christmas tree on fire, the two embark on “The Gift of the Magi”-style quests to replace the tree before Harold’s intimidating father-in-law (played by Machete himself, Danny Trejo) finds out about the mishap. What follows is an adventure that includes a baby ingesting numerous illegal substances, Russian mobsters trying to off the duo, Harold shooting Santa (the real Santa) in the head and the obligatory cameo by Neil Patrick Harris (who, along with Trejo, are some of the highlights of the film).

Kumar (Kal Penn) and Harold (John Cho) try to find a new tree in "A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas"

Clearly the Cheech & Chong of their generation (despite the smoke), Harold & Kumar find laugh-inducing ways out of each of their predicaments (usually with the help of some sort of mind-altering substance or two). And though the 3-D effects might seem unnecessary, they not only become integral parts of many scenes (especially the acid-induced claymation sequence), but the movie finds plenty of ways to poke (and I do mean poke) fun at the use of such technology in a stoner movie. The movie gives potty-humor nods to pretty much every Christmas classic that has preceded it, from A Christmas Carol and Miracle on 34th Street to A Christmas Story and National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. And, of course, it wouldn’t be a feel-good holiday movie with out a feel-good Christmas miracle for everyone in the end. But in this case most of the people are feeling good because of what’s in the bong, not what’s under the tree.

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas. Directed by Todd Strauss-Schulson. Starring John Cho and Kal Penn. Rated R. www.haroldandkumar.com.

Review by Jonathan Williams

Even a German threesome isn’t exciting in Tom Tykwer’s “3”

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Full of graphic sex, themes of mortality and the origin of life, and inexplicable ballet and poetry vignettes, 3 is everything you want your artsy foreign films to be… except entertaining. While director Tom Tykwer’s most acclaimed film, Run Lola Run, was exceptionally fast paced, he finds his balance with 3, which is exceptionally slow. A tedious watch, 3 fails to bring either the excitement of Run Lola Run or the character development of his more recent films like The Princess and The Warrior and Heaven.

Adam (Devid Striesow) and Hanna (Sophie Rois) in "3"

Perhaps the tedium of the film is an intentional reflection of the tedium of the long-term relationship between main characters Simon (Sebastian Schipper) and Hanna (Sophie Rois), both of whom have ambiguous jobs of a creative nature. Hanna, a doctor of some sort, seems to be the host of a television talk show who moonlights on an ethics committee that determines funding for scientific research. I couldn’t help but chuckle when Simon is asked what it is that he does and he replies that he’s an “art engineer,” and after a pause is asked, “What does that mean?” I’m not sure if the film was being self-aware at this point or if this bit of dialog was included to explain what it is that the characters do, but even with the explanation and the many scenes showing the characters at work, I still have no idea what it is either of them does for a living. I only know that they are very self-important and artistic.

The film is full of heavy-handed symbolism, apparent even in the characters’ names. The three main characters all have biblical names. Simon, a healer in the Bible, ironically has cancer. Likewise, Hanna, a notoriously infertile biblical character, becomes pregnant. Then there’s Adam, the first man. The film’s Adam (Devid Striesow) is a sexually promiscuous, motorcycle-riding, choir-singing, soccer-playing fertility specialist scientist researching stem cells and chimera, the scientific term for a single organism that is comprised of tissues from multiple organisms. Adam is also a father, a karate master and a sailor. All that and he still finds time to pick up guys at the gym! An obvious symbol for transformation and new life, Adam brings passion back into the lives of the couple when he independently meets and becomes intimately involved with each of them.

Adam (Devid Striesow) and Simon (Sebastian Schipper) in "3"

The film is visually interesting, incorporating several editing techniques including a notable Brian De Palma-esque collage of panels that gives us a sampling of the lives of the characters at the beginning of the film and again during the development of their relationships. There’s also a heavily symbolic cross-cutting montage that juxtaposes the removal of Simon’s testicle with Hanna’s initial infidelity. Yes, Simon has testicular cancer, which is only one of the two cancer-related storylines, which is one too many for a movie not about cancer. This allows for one of the most bizarre and offensive aspects of the storyline, where a straight male character suddenly becomes interested in men after being castrated.

The film gets better as it goes along, but watching it is laborious and not just because of the subtitles that move too fast during the rapid bursts of conversation and the overlapping dialog. In whole, the film is not without value, addressing the midlife crisis phenomenon with a unique angle, very relatable to aging hipsters who have failed to find meaning in their artsy careers and non-traditional relationships; who have ended up, despite all efforts to the contrary, in the same type of boring monotonous lifestyles as their parents. Life is a cycle, as this film demonstrates, and there are inevitable phases. The characters in this film find a sort of contentment not by fighting the cycle, but ultimately by surrendering to it, although in an unexpected and non-traditional way.

3. Directed by Tom Tykwer. Starring Sebastian Schipper, Sophie Rois and Devid Striesow. Not rated. www.strandreleasing.com.

Review by Jennifer Waller Sibley

“The Thing” is the thing that happens before “The Thing”

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A helicopter flies over the stark white Arctic landscape and, in the distance, a lone object cuts a path through the snow. I’m expecting a dog since that’s how John Carpenter‘s 1982 version of The Thing begins. But it’s not a dog and this isn’t a remake. In fact, it was the ’82 version that was a remake of 1951’s The Thing from Another World, widely regarded as a commentary on the Cold War. Likewise, Carpenter’s version is often credited with being a reflection of the AIDS epidemic, the major source of fear in the early ‘80s. So, one would expect this new version of The Thing to reflect current societal fears (terrorism, perhaps?). But this film doesn’t seem to take its legacy of social commentary very seriously and lacks the element of tapping into prevailing societal fear that the previous versions did so well.

Kate (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) and Sander (Ulrich Thomsen) dissect their finding in "The Thing"

However, this doesn’t mean that the film isn’t scary. It has its share of startling moments, and certainly capitalizes on the gross-out factor that modern special effects technology allows. The “thing” itself is a morphing mass of heads and limbs that attacks and kills in the most disturbing ways. It’s this ability to morph that is at the heart of The Thing. It’s the old Trojan Horse, sneaking into a base camp and attacking from the inside. Only this time, instead of Trojans, it’s aliens who crashed into Earth thousands of years ago only to be frozen in the Antarctic until a group of Norwegian researchers uncover the crash, along with a survivor frozen in a block of ice nearby.

The Norwegians recruit a team of scientists, including paleontologist Kate Lloyd (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), to unearth the alien being. The casting of a woman in the leading role is quite a departure from Carpenter’s version, which noticeably lacks women, which in itself is a departure from classic horror which has a habit of depending on women to be the helpless victims that need to be saved. Thankfully, Kate doesn’t need a man to save her and takes on a

leadership role in the group of men. The other woman in the cast doesn’t fare so well, but Kate manages to hold her own while still being realistically feminine, rather than have the mannish qualities of her predecessor in female sci-fi horror heroines, Ripley from the Alien films.

Shortly after Kate and the team dig up the “thing,” it disappears and preliminary research of its tissue reveals that it’s a replicator, allowing it to transform into identical versions of its victims, setting the scene of suspicion and distrust. The scientists realize that they’ve been infiltrated, but they don’t know who has been infected and everyone is a suspect, kind of like at the security checkpoint at the airport, but not really.

Kate (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) fights for survival in "The Thing"

It is this element, along with the inherent isolation found in an Antarctic research station, that creates the underlying tension of the entire film. But the large cast diminishes the feeling of isolation and the quick succession of deaths fails to allow the audience to develop empathy for most of the characters, whose only purpose seems to be brutal onscreen deaths. I can’t remember the names of the characters or anything about them, but am left with several gruesome images in my memory.

Overall, the fun of the movie is recognizing the setup for the Carpenter version – an axe stuck in a wall, a charred two-headed corpse in the snow, and the bridge to the ’82 version, a lone dog running in the snow.

The Thing. Directed by Matthijs van Heijnengen. Starring Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Joel Edgerton and Ulrich Thomsen. Rated R. www.thethingmovie.net.

Review by Jennifer Waller Sibley

“Rocky” meets Rock ’em Sock ’em Robots in “Real Steel”

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Bruno Sammartino wrestled an orangutan, “Superstar” Billy Graham and Tracy Smothers wrestled bears and Ambush fights an enormous bull at a carnival sideshow. Unlike Sammartino and Graham, however, Ambush does not live to fight another day after the bull victoriously dismantles the giant robot in the opening scene of Real Steel.

Max (Dakota Goyo, left) and Charlie Kenton (Hugh Jackman, right) prepare Noisy Boy for battle in "Real Steel."

Set in a not-so-distant future where cell phones are a bit flashier, freight trucks are slightly sleeker and robots provide the combat carnage that fight fans were never truly able to find in flesh-and-blood boxing, wrestling and MMA matches, Real Steel takes the Rock ’em Sock ’em Robots concept and gives it a cheer-for-the-underdog Rocky treatment. Only the underdog in this movie is Charlie Kenton (Hugh Jackman, aka Wolverine from the X-Men movies, aka the guy who helped Zack Ryder defeat WWE United States Champion Dolph Ziggler on Raw a few weeks ago), a former fighter-turned-con artist who will hustle anyone for a quick buck. That includes his son Max (Dakota Goyo, aka young Thor from Thor), who becomes barter material after unexpectedly entering Charlie’s life after 11 years of estrangement.

What Charlie lacks in character (he’s not only a conman, but not a very good one as he continues to rack up more and more debt with sleazy promoters), he makes up for in his in-ring accomplishments. But in a world where robots have taken the place of humans in the ring, that no longer means very much. That is until he and his son find a decrepit older robot that, much like Charlie in his prime, proves to have enough heart (albeit mechanical) to hold his own against bigger bots.

Despite Charlie’s absence, the apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree as Max proves to have a stubborn, all-or-nothing mentality similar to his father’s. Together, the father, son and robot (a somewhat WALL-E-like warrior named Atom) work their way from seedy underground fight clubs all the way up to the colossal World Robot Boxing league. But not without some additional struggles as Charlie’s deceitful past keeps catching up with him in the form of vindictive debt collectors, custody-seeking relatives and the like.

Atom (left), takes it to undefeated WRP Champion Zeus in "Real Steel."

While the story is predictable and sappy (especially when Max tells his father, “I want you to fight for me. That’s all I’ve ever wanted” towards the film’s end), and the idea of having robots that are advanced enough to fight like humans in a world where the same advanced technology doesn’t appear to be used in more productive ways, Real Steel is successful at providing the type of violent escapist fun typically reserved for the summer movie season. Plus, there are giant robots with names like Zeus and Noisy Boy that beat the fluids out of each other.

Real Steel. Directed by Shawn Levy. Starring Hugh Jackman, Dakota Goyo and Evangeline Lilly. Rated PG-13. www.steelgetsreal.com.

“50/50” proves that even cancer can be more than halfway funny

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Cancer is funny! Just ask Will Reiser, Seth Rogen’s writing partner who was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago. Cancer is obviously not a humorous subject, but, of course, if you’re friends with Seth Rogen you can probably find the humor in pretty much anything.

Written by Reiser, 50/50 is the story of his battle with cancer and the oddly comical events

Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Seth Rogen in "50/50." Photo by Chris Helcermanas-Benge

that helped him overcome his struggle. Starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Inception) as Adam and Rogen as his best friend Kyle, 50/50 is a touching tale of Adam’s shocking diagnosis and the reactions of those closest to him. As is often the case in times of personal crisis, Adam quickly learns who his true friends are as his flaky artist girlfriend (Bryce Dallas Howard), mother (Anjelica Houston), rookie therapist (Twilight‘s Anna Kendrick) and Kyle all find different ways to deal with his condition, as well as their own personal struggles.

Channeling bits of Edward Norton and Edward Furlong, Gordon-Levitt effectively portrays the isolating journey of a clean-living, healthy man striken with a seemingly fatal disease that amplifies other everyday stresses. While his world seems to be falling apart, Adam (with the help of his somewhat schlubby stoner friend) is able to stand strong and overcome such obstacles as his increasingly distant girlfriend, nagging mother and even some of Kyle’s own shortcomings (such as taking advantage of the medicinal marijuana prescription meant to ease Adam’s pain).

Anna Kendrick, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Seth Rogen in "50/50." Photo by Ed Araquel

Rogen, playing a role very similar to the one he played in real life when Reiser went through the same ordeal, is able to make otherwise depressing moments, such as shaving Adam’s head when he begins chemotherapy and discovering exactly why Adam’s girlfriend hasn’t been around as much as she used to be, awkwardly amusing. Eventually, as circumstances start to ease up, Adam is able to gradually take on a more positive outlook, allowing his relationships with the people around him (at least the ones who’ve proven they actually care) to become stronger and more meaningful.

Thankfully, Adam (like his real-life counterpart) is able to defy his 50/50 odds of surviving, overcoming not only his illness, but also some of the other shortcomings that had previously seemed very minor. And even though 50/50 is a heartwarming, sometimes sad, struggle, it seems that one of the best therapies was simply seeing the absurdity in the situation.

50/50. Directed by Jonathan Levine. Starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Seth Rogen, Anna Kendrick, Bryce Dallas Howard and Anjelica Houston. Rated R. www.50-50themovie.com.

Review by Jonathan Williams

“Machine Gun Preacher” unloads on real-life badass Sam Childers

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When I heard the name Machine Gun Preacher, I expected some sort of ’70s-style exploitation throwback along the lines of Machete and Hobo with a Shotgun. And with a plot aimed directly at an ex-con, former heroin addict and reformed biker badass who finds Jesus (thanks to his ex-stripper wife) after a drug-induced episode that ends with him dumping a bludgeoned hitchhiker on the side of the road.

While it still sounds a lot like the sensationalized stuff Rob Zombie or Quentin Tarantino might come up with, Machine Gun Preacher is actually based on the true story of Sam Childers, who combined his violent tendencies with his newfound faith and took it to the Lord’s Resistance Army, a rebel group that has been terrorizing Ugandan and Sudanese villages for years. After befriending a member of the peace-keeping Sudan People’s Liberation Army (Souléymane Sy Savané) and seeing the horrors that the LRA inflicts on innocent Sudanese people each day, Childers begins systematically fighting back against the LRA, going so far as to launch attacks on them rather than sit back and wait for them to attack during the night.

Childers, passionately played by 300‘s Gerard Butler, makes it his mission to free the children that have been enslaved by the LRA (most of which are either forced to fight on the side of the LRA or go into the sex trade). Then he decides to take the ultimate first step in regentrifying a neighborhood when he purchases a piece of land right in the middle of the war-torn area and builds an orphanage there.

While his actions seem noble, especially in comparison to his unscrupulous past, we soon see that Childers has, in many ways, traded his drug addiction for a new obsession, finding a more productive outlet for his unstable, violent tendencies along the way. Who’s to argue when he’s liberating dozens of Sudanese children and giving people who have done far more gruesome things than he’s ever done a taste of their own malevolent medicine, all in the name of God? Well, his wife (Source Code‘s Michelle Monaghan), daughter (Madeline Carroll) and best friend (Revolutionary Road‘s Michael Shannon), who become more and more neglected as Childers’ obsession and anger continue to grow.

Though the film attempts to convey an uplifting message, it’s hard for Childers to ever become a completely likable person due to his selfish and unstable temperament. But that grittiness lends a sense of realism to Machine Gun Preacher, clearly illustrating that Childers’ intentions are often misguided ways for him to unleash his aggression. But with Childers continuing to fight his fight to this day, we can all be thankful that he’s turned his machine guns towards more deserving targets than the previous recipients of his ire.

Machine Gun Preacher. Directed by Marc Forster. Starring Gerard Butler, Michelle Monaghan, Michael Shannon and Souléymane Sy Savané. Rated R. www.machinegunpreacher.org/movie.

Review by Jonathan Williams

“Killer Elite” is far from elite despite killer cast

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Killer Elite opens with the crinkled, worn-out eyes of Jason Statham peering into the camera. Unfortunately this image foreshadows the similarly worn-out story that is about to unfold.

Touted as being based on a true story, and starring a seemingly unbeatable cast of Statham, Clive Owen and Robert De Niro, Killer Elite is filled with fast-paced fight scenes that are often hard to follow, much like those from the first Transformers movie.

Jason Statham as Danny and Robert De Niro as Hunter

Though the characters have names like Hunter and Spike, they might as well be John and Jim Doe because of their lack of depth. But few people will be expecting character development with Killer Elite and will be going to see Statham, Owens and De Niro make macho magic. While each actor does a fine job in his respective tough guy role, it often feels like they are making an instructional video on action film acting with stern looks, stubbly faces and no blinking.

Statham plays Danny, a mercenary for hire who wants out but is forced back in when his friend and mentor Hunter (DeNiro) is kidnapped. While Statham is perfectly suited for the action star role, he is not as convincing in the more chameleon-like roles where he somehow fools nurses into thinking he is a doctor and tricks the military into thinking he’s a solider. Statham eventually crosses paths with Spike (Owen), another former mercenary, but the two lack chemistry, leaving the audience unsatisfied after all the buildup.

Despite being based on actual events, Killer Elite is a story that has been told many times before. For those looking for mindless action, you might be better off revisting American Gangster or an old Jean-Claude Van Damme movie. But at least Killer Elite offers a glimpse at a reasonably nice pair of breasts, although I would have preferred bigger nipples.

Killer Elite. Directed by Gary McKendry. Starring Jason Statham, Clive Owen and Robert De Niro. Rated R. www.killerelite.com.

Review by Jason Von Stein